The Itinerary

In contrast to Euro chill, heat here waves from 40 degrees one day to low twenties and back the next. Well paid cricketers struggle, fail or survive and all of us bear up to the dismal headlines of broken infrastructure, banks and child care providers. In this light I thought it appropriate to bring to you some of the lite side of life as reported by our local bulletins.

First off and delightful to one such as I who has little respect for the Royal Rum Corps also known as the NSW Police, I relate the case of Detective Inspector Dobbins (name changed not to protect anything other than my bad memory) a three times the limit passenger when he arrived at MacDonald’s Brookvale. Completely in form he transferred to the driver seat to flash his police badge and receive the discount that was his due. He then proceeded to the pick up window where he thought it prudent to hand over control of the vehicle to his partner. Alighting to the fresh air he experienced that heady feeling we all know so well and took several sideways steps before correcting and over correcting to end arse up in a hedge. Alarmed staff alerted two constables who were dining within and our Detective Inspector’s Goose, just like his meat patty, was cooked. Was it worth it I want to ask though of course I can’t unless he happens on this blog. I shall instead salute the two young constables who if they still have jobs are now the most reviled in the force.

Next comes the good news in a report compiled from a taskforce created by forty nine US state attorney- generals that the internet may not be such a dangerous place for children after all. On line predators and paedophiles are not nearly as net savvy as peer bullies who turn out to be the real problem. It’s doubtful though that Senator Conroy or his boss Mr. Budd will have noticed this and take it into consideration as they flail about in their own anti porn fetish world.

Best of all was the news of the batch of two headed bass in the Noosa River recently. Unfortunately they survived only 48 hours after hatching, frustrating my deal with the Chinese who were very interested. Scientists are however heartened and are still working toward the two bodied fish which holds promise to alleviate the world food crisis. Their motto: ‘anything Jesus can do we can do better’ has now become a mantra for many on the African continent.

Last (I hear a collective sigh of relief) and on a more personal level we salute the Google boys on the release of Google Masterpiece on Google Earth. Now it is no longer necessary for me to take a not long enough too expensive holiday with Alice through Europe this Sept-Oct (see following detail) Of course there’s a way to go yet till they come up with Google taste, Google smell and Google Atmosphere but at least I can view Google masterpiece. No queues no entrance fee, no distance from my own fridge with my own bottle of bubbles. Can you bring your own bubbles to the Louvre? It’s a good idea isn’t it.

Anyway here for your comments is the itinerary for our oh so soon to be booked and paid for big adventure. If you wish to advise or critique do so post haste for these things once set in motion have a life of their own. I don’t suppose we can expect any help or encouragement from Kev but I will be writing to Gordon Brown and Silvio Berlusconi who looks like my type of guy, Queen Beatrix, Jos’e Luis Rodriguez Zapatero who will be like kin if he’s anything like his late American cousin Frank, Nic Sarkosy and wives, C’ecilia and Carla Bruni, both listed in little black book, requesting patronage. Cant but help to pull in obligations in situations like these don’t you think? I’ll welcome connections to Dukes, Duchesses, Barons, Baronesses, Princes or paupers, anyone you may think will be charmed by my “lets have another drink, your shout” clever repartee.

By the way, those of you already resident in The UK please ignore my previous reference to Gordon Brown. I have no intention or desire to have anything to do with that Scottish Stoat and have in fact some excellent royal relations in Queenie Cat and Countess Kell already embedded (if that’s not too suggestive a term)

My apologies,

Auntie

Alice and Roberts Big adventure

September
24. - Bangkok
25. - Bangkok
26. - London (jet lag)
27. - London
28. - London
29. - Amsterdam (Two hour flight)
30. - Amsterdam

October
1. - Amsterdam
2. - Paris (Four-hour train)
3. - Paris
4. - Treviso (Venice) (Two-hour flight)
5. - Treviso
6. - Florence (Three-hour train)
7. - Florence
8. - Florence
9. - Naples (Four-hour train)
10. - Naples
11. - Naples (Positano?)
12. - Naples (Positano?)
13. - Rome (Two-hour train)
14. - Rome
15. - Seville via Madrid (three-hour flight + two-hour train)
16. - Seville
17. - Seville
18. - Cordoba
19. - Cordoba
20. Cordoba
21. - Granada
22. - Granada -
23. - Barcelona
24. - Barcelona
25. - Barcelona
26. - London
Alice only from here , Robert returns to Sydney via Bangkok
27. - New York
28. - New York
29. - New York
30. - New York
31. - Flight
November
1 – Sydney
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
I should take this opportunity to alert you all to the start of this years party season on the occasion of my family day on the eighth of February. You know the place and the time, now you know the date.
Someone was going to make a list of these events. Does anyone know anything about this?



Next door neighbour, ex antique dealer has obviously been stealing stuff from Easter Island, or maybe he’s just a ‘big Simpsons’ fan.