This Silly Season

Come on its lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you, um, please excuse me after the last few weeks of ‘Bunnings torture’ this type of tune has left what is probably a permanent record on my synapses. Has anyone gone on a sleigh ride since the Communist Revolution? If that weren’t enough the steadily rising height of pallet stacks, the congestion of side stacks in isles and the ever larger variety of clip strip product makes it almost impossible to make your way with a trolley without some bell ringer or Rudolf the red nosed reindeer to guide your sleigh tonight. Ooops! Shopper and team tensions rise and lead to more instances like the one I had with the lady who wanted the fan that seemed to be advertised on the hand written label for $29:99 but had no other identifying message. Hand written labels must be accompanied by a fineline number which identifies what it relates too, this one in contravention to that rule had none. Anyone with a felt pen could have written it and as she alternately begged, cried and threatened in a display that would have made Kate Blanchet look amateur I began to wonder was she in fact the author. Is it any wonder then that I find myself dreaming of a white Christmas just like the one we had before – not. I’ve got to get a hold of myself.

Now you find me blissed without a carol in the world after yesterdays Boxing festivities. It never ceases to amaze what memories a day’s indulgence of the fermented grape can obliterate. Boxing Days family festivities were so well attended this year that it seems unnecessary to report them at all as there would be no non attending reader to benefit. Then I remember Chris and Andrea who had attended last year, the only ones who could benefit from the traditional early morning (their time) phone call. Well I’m afraid they’ll have to rely on others this year as all I’m prepared to report is that the newest family easily stole the day. For my part I can report that I departed without effort at around six in taxi in company of Alice and Jack. Checking through my photos today has proved a useful reminder of our adventures thereafter which included luxurious walks harbour side, punctuated by pit stops at conveniently located pubs.

Up at six this morning and feeling remarkably well till coffee withdrawals began to set in I set out to retrieve my car wondering just which way a train would go from North Sydney to Epping. Blow me down though for by some divine intervention as I walk up to the station a bus pulls up plainly stating its destination as Epping. Twenty odd minutes later, after only a brief diversion to Macquarie Shopping Centre and University, I was at Epping station beginning to comprehend that the light heartedness I felt was probably a remnant of yesterdays drunkenness, and wondering about the consequences this might have on car retrieval. Alls well that ends well as they say and an hour later I was safely ensconced, with the door locked, at home.

With batteries fully charged I set off about four thirty for Coogee Bay via McMahons point for my gifts including the wonderful recorder. I had no intention of leaving these unguarded (Jack and Alice were back at Palmy) protected in this security building only by the constantly droning talk radio and the lights on timers travelling like phantoms from room to room. Travelling south I had an excellent view of a massive thunderhead stationed it seemed directly over The Coogee Bay Hotel (nice touch Kell) and wondered should I prime the recorder for some cracking hail effects. Arriving drenched and sober I was treated to the spectacle of a good proportion of my family, drunk in public and determined to hang onto their hard won four way seating station in the protection of a giant brolly thingie. These brollys were quite effective, the closer to the centre the better, off the flooded ground preferably, the latter achieved by sitting on tables and chair backs. Communication between tables for bar tidys though was a wet nightmare. Each rib of brolly ended in a running tap, plentiful and impossible to avoid. Drunken and cavorting family barely seemed to comprehend these things which were far too obvious, to one already saturated and not wishing to walk back to Coogee today, on light. Safe to say I never got completely into the spirit but it was truly wonderful to see my family from this perspective. Now I know I need never more suffer that guilty doubt after a family day that I laughed too loud or talked too much. I love you family. Hope there are not too many sore heads today.

Epilogue: Appendix 1; ( Liver 0) Instead of sensibly consolidating my day of sobriety and staying home to publish last night, I fell for the ‘Night out with Kara’ trap. This led as some of you knew even better than I, to The Woollahara Hotel to be entertained by the wonderful Rinki Dinks who I duly recorded on my wonderful new machine for later upload to the net. Sympathetic to Kara’s period pain I treated both of us to a heart starting cocktail before settling to a steady diet of Redbank Emily. (Surprising; the detail you recall) It would have been OK had I gone home when the entertainment ended at about ten but as I’m learning it is about this time that the Kara effect comes in to play and I have vague recollections of the Annandale Hotel but not the brand of drink. Enough to say I woke very early, minus another ten thousand odd brain cells, for which I tried to compensate with codeine. By one I recognised that I would live and leaving the house for essential food discovered my agony was to be prolonged by the walk to Annandale to retrieve my car. Ah well seasons greetings I guess.

Aunty


The Star who with all of his being seemed to say “Ho–hum are we there yet?”


The proud father


Probably the only member of the family aside from James and Jamie with clear memories of the day


Stephen workshopping his upcoming role in Overbelly II as ‘The Menace’



I was fortunate to get this picture of the cast of Overbelly II and am in negotiation with People Pix and Post for an obscene amount of moolah



This well presented fellow appears strangely and not always supported by Mat trying to upstage, in many of this years photos


As it’s well known that beautiful babies inspire in others the desire to make families and families need homes I thought I should include this untimely oportunity