Back on line

How lucky are you? So many blogs, or at least blog launch pads, have passed through my mind during these past two weeks, right up to the present internet disconnection, now five days old and growing into an irritating little bastard. Drawn out discussions of the pitfalls of moving, broadsides at Telcos and other greedy bastards, complaints about personal degeneration, all entwined with their relevance to the new deadly sins, this is what you have missed. Not to say that the lash of these will not find your backs some times, but largely they are past and redeemable only in the name of history.

What is reportable is my safe and comfortable settlement here in West Stanmore, more central to Petersham, the Portuguese heart of Sydney for those not in the know, than Enmore the throbbing physical heart as all do know. Here in Gordon Crescent I am privileged, just as our wealthy late nineteenth ancestors were, with the opportunity to count trains from my mansion, albeit one in need of a half sole and heel. In addition I can count planes, which leads me to the conclusion that those nineteenth century merchant landholders were indeed visionaries. By want of my plane counting advantage my politically well connected Greek landlord has been rewarded handsomely for double glazing almost all windows and installing air conditioning, in my case in both lounge and bedroom. Mmmm, yummy I hear you say but you should not forget that all goodies come with a price and in this case the price is the double hung, double glazing. Yes those good old fashioned windows with two sashes that can be pushed up and down supported by ropes to weights hidden in the casement only here all windows have four sashes, two up and two down and instead of ropes, patent plastic support system already succumbing to ultra violet deterioration that are very difficult to move. The air cond. units are very quite but have an exhaust outlet in the bedroom ceiling that switches on and off randomly broadcasting a sound not unlike the hollow roar of the next arriving train in the underground. In addition an exhaust fan connected to the light switch in the bathroom takes off like a 747 and completely disrupts my plane count. Oh boo-hoo I hear you, well I can only say that if you’ve ever cleaned double hung windows to get your bond back, try cleaning double double hung windows or take note on the Lease Condition Report as I did that the windows were noted as unbroken but without any mention of cleanliness.

My next item is a cautionary note on modern culture and has to do with the alleged cost of copper. Moving from a two bedroom with hall and balcony flat, not to mention generous kitchen and linen closet, to a one bedroom flat, it was obvious that sacrifices would have to be made. In the early stages of moving, still unwilling to recognise that my junk was junk, I took a hands free phone kit, DVD player, pop corn maker and set of computer speakers and placed them on top of the front brick fence with accompanying remotes and transformers in an attempt to obviate their still useful working order. Next morning all were as I had left them minus their power cables which had been neatly circumcised at the base. What kind of nark I wondered would render all these items useless for no seeming reason? This question was answered later that day, by Jane who’s ear is obviously closer to the rail than mine. People salvage these for the value of the copper, and I should have felt good that someone was benefiting from my junk but doubt lingered enough for me to hold back the fans, mine and Alices, heater and VCR. When there was nothing to do but put them out I did and an hour or so later encountered the lead reaper himself, at his task. I told him that the VCR was a goodie and he admitted he needed one but he’d already neutered it. I tried to explain that the weight of the fans and heater, also a fan, was at least half copper windings but he seemed incapable of comprehending this. Last night I discovered from media watch the scale of the delusion this poor small minded fellow has been labouring under. Tabloid media, one of the commercial TV stations, had reported the bust of a container of stolen copper wire on its way to Asia for $150.00 a kilo with police endorsement that this was so. As Media Watch reports the price of new copper wire maxes at $7.00 a kilo so I hope my friend gets his wire striped and off to Asia before this news breaks over there.

30-03-08
GENTLEMENS LODGINGS
This morning, my first to rise in my new lodgings post a complete (four day) working week, whilst admiring my visage in my well lit easterly facing bathroom and inspired by two weeks growth of beard evolving along its natural line into a goatee, I began to reflect that this will be my very first gentleman’s lodgings. No concessions to wife, lover or child required here. Overnight guests are possible but no permanent arrangement is required for other than I. The electric clippers hanging cleverly and conveniently from the hook I put in the architrave without even considering the possible arguments of another was the clincher. A glance around my rooms confirms I have settled quickly, furniture placed, pictures hung and media wired ready for a good book and a toddy. Who knows maybe a nap. I think I’ll soon be looking for some moustache wax and a bottle of Bay rum.