Okeefereport

This is replacement blog to provide a medium for the extended o'keefe family to keep each other informed of all their news, travels, adventures and whatever. Happy blogging.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

1968: Part Two

I'm back. When I left you last I was still in Oz and life was a buzz. But I had itchy feet. I had been saying often to friends that I was going overseas. One Saturday night in the pub my friend James (never Jim) Hilton said, "Listen, bitch, you're always saying you're going, so why don't you go? Look around this bar. You've been rude to half the people here and shagged the other half, so go."

Whilst I like to think there was a lot of hyperbole in this statement, there was also, alas, an element of truth. So I sold the car, resigned from St Pat's and got the Qantas Under 26 cheap ticket on the old Kangaroo Route to London. This allowed two stopovers. I chose Hong Kong and Athens and left Oz in July 1968.

Hong Kong was Ok but uneventful. The only thing I now recall is going to the disco in the basement of the Hong Kong Hilton, a bit of a pilgrimage as that's where Peter Allen was performing when Judy Garland dropped in with daughter Liza and we all know where that led.

Athens was something else. On the flight there I'd teamed up with another Aussie also called Hugh and we shared a cheap hotel room in the Plaka. We were jet lagged and went wandering the streets at four in the morning. Apart from seeing the Parthenon perched up on the Acropolis at dawn, we were gobsmacked to walk into what we would call a milk bar and see all the bottles of booze lined up on shelves behind the bar. This was a whole new world in the Old World.

Athens life was fun, they still broke plates in the restaurants and we met up with an Aussie showgirl (read:stripper) who called herself Sundae Knight (oh, dear) but everyone was saying, you must go to Mykonos.

Today, along with Amsterdam, San Francisco and, I guess, Sydney, Mykonos is a major gay destination. But not in 1968. You caught the ferry, along with Greek nonnas and their various wildlife - trussed pigs and chickens in string bags - at Piraeus, the port for Athens, and arrived in Mykonos several hours later. Those days there were no hotels in Mykonos. Instead, you were met at the dock by the local mamas offering beds in their homes - jostling and shouting that they had the best rooms, the best prices. I lobbed up in one of these, occupying the teenage son's bedroom - he'd been relegated to the couch in the hallway.

In the morning you ambled down to the waterfront - lorded over by Pete the Pelican - and ordered breakfast from one of numerous cafes. Us westerners got a jug of hot water, a small tin of Nescafe, slices of fresh bread, a little jar of honey and, if lucky, a small pot of butter. Oh, and some sugar. Delicious, after a night on the town.

And where had one spent that? Oh, at the Nine Muses, the only nightspot on the island, right on the shore of the harbour. On my first night there I was introduced to Greek dancing - all that holding hands and bobbing about Zorba-style - which was fun. A dashing older man, looking like David Niven, was a major player in all of this, getting all the young men on the floor (there were plenty of girls there, but this was blokes' stuff)and it was only when I lobbed up in London a few weeks later that I saw his picture in all the papers and discovered that he had been Best Man at Jackie and Aristotle Onassis' wedding. (Timing, Hugh).

Though Mykonos was not then a gay venue, there were a few poofs about and we sussed each other out. Each day you took one of the two minibuses (the only motor vehicles on the island) to one of the only two accessible beaches: Plati Yalos and Pisarou (spelling dodgy). Beautiful stretches of white sand bordering the wine dark Agean of Homer. The only structure on each beach was a tumbledown restaurant where you bought beer (or retsina if you were really ill and poor), then at lunchtime you went in and pointed at the food you wanted and feasted on salty, lemony seafood and salad. No need to speak the language. At 5.30 the last bus headed back to the port and there was no question of no room - we all piled on board for a crowded trip. On one trip I said to a friend, "Why don't you give your seat to that pregnant woman?" He said, "I didn't realise she was pregnant." I replied, "She isn't, but she will be before the trip is over." She glowered at me and I learnt a first lesson of travel: don't assume no one else speaks English.

I met two good friends there. David Hayman was a university student from Glasgow and he was camping in a barn just out of town. Each morning he could gather his breakfast eggs without leaving his sleeping bag. The other was Joe Everingham, an older American who was the Director of the theatre at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. I asked with some surprise why a Technology Institute needed a theatre. He told me that the authorities had realised that while they were producing the cream of America's new scientists, there people could only communicate with each other and machines. Not the man in the street. Theatre was the humaniser and he had a grant of $2 million (in 1968!)to make it happen. These days in most US universities you do first year arts no matter what course you are pursuing. How good is that!

I had intended staying in Mykonos for two days and ended up staying for ten. I only left then because my clothes were managing to stand up by themselves. It was my first experience of a European lifestyle and exotic beyond belief. I thought it the height of sophistication that a group of Germans would stroll down to the port each afternoon around 5 o'clock and order breakfast as if that's what you did. That never happened in Sydney. At about the same hour we were ordering our first ouzo and water (two drachma, that's about fourpence or three cents for you children) and gearing up to hit the tavernas for grilled chicken and wine before heading for the Nine Muses one more time.

Once again the old clock on the wall says time is up and we haven't even got to London yet. So there's more to come.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Australia Day Whoopee

So what does Australia day mean to me? Well for one thing the cricket starts a day later to cater to the long weekend. That’d be good but I’m sleeping fine anyway. Maybe I should set up a practise in NY to cater to Heath Ledger like folk, selling my patent drug free, cricket watch, sleep and relaxation techniques.

Some yank called Kernaghan has won Australian of the year. I’m not surprised, I’ve been thinking of asking Hugh if he still has that white suit and could I borrow it to do Tom Wolf impersonations to improve my chances. Alice, bless her soul, always nominates me but what about the rest of you? You know what they say, not in it can’t win it

Endless tennis ended when the Serbian mimic beat the French wild card but I can’t watch tennis, it’s too busy and impossible to sleep to. Ferries raced, Big Days were out and celebrated so. My backyard neighbours perpetuated their tradition of handing their house and backyard pool to the Canterbury Bulldogs who in turn perpetuated their tradition of turning in pre dawn by as small a margin as possible.

I celebrated the day with a sausage sizzle at Bunnings followed by take away spag-bol and a beer or two.

Lucky for me and you, this maudlin rant has been brought to a close by Reg Mombassa’s Herald front page and accompanying editorial on the barbecue. He eulogises the NZ mutton boil up and speculates about the potential of genetically modified turkey size blow fly as barbecue meat. Yummy. I’m sure you all agree that it’s nice to find kindred spirits and I understand Reg also shares my passion for telegraph poles.

Wait a bit it may turn maudlin again, here now at 5:58 PM the cricketers have all started hugging each other especially Gilly, with still a session to go. If the music wasn’t so loud I might hear and understand but oh no it’s one of those we haven’t got any more time, gott’a go now draws. The cops should try showing this stuff to rioting crowds in place of pepper spray. Calm them down quick smart I recon.

Hear is a little ditty I wrote for the occasion to be sung to the tune of Peter Allens, “I still call Australia home” and don’t worry I can almost guarantee it wont happen again.


I sit here at home just writing this blog,
Hoping that others might read it and log
A comment or two o that would be great
Hurry up now get started, it’s never too late.

I’ve been to Strathfield and found my way back,
I lived in Leichhardt in a three bedroom flat.
I’m always evicted wherever I roam,
There’s still no place I can call home.

I’ve waited with starlets in supermarket cues,
I’ve met Coreys and Corbys in crowded pub loos,
I call up Gilly but he’s never at home,
And I don’t think his mobiles on roam.

I don’t travel much, that’s easy to see
Up street to Enmore that’s enough for me
Over the bridge with Alice to lunch,
Is all I need of that northern bunch

I hope that next year to Tuscany will I go
And it’s to this end financial seeds I do sow,
Somewhere out there on a road back to Rome
I might find a place to call home.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Happy Australia Day... and happy birthday John

Hi everyone

Hope you have a wonderful Aussie Day long weekend in the sunshine. I'll be celebrating in London with a pub crawl along the Thames tomorrow. Look out for photos next week.

Also, happy birthday to John - hope you have a wonderful day on Sunday.

Lots of love xxx Kel

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Alice"s comment / blog (no editing required)

Although I haven't blogged for a year or so, I do read all of yours. I enjoyed this blog entry Dad... the same James Ricketson whose apartment you nearly blew up has been leaving messages for Jack and I to hang out. I might let him know that you're the reason his electricity bill was so high one quarter all those years ago.
And sorry Dad, as a sub-editor, I must correct your 'Viola!' - one of my favourite mistakes to correct. The word you wrote is in fact a stringed musical instrument. The word you meant is spelt 'voila', and not 'wulla' - another, far more embarrassing way people commonly mispell it.
Wow, I guess this counts as blogging! So while I'm here... Jack and I have found a new, larger flat in McMahons Point, not far from our current abode. We're excited about moving Saturday week.
I'm sure Dad will have similar luck finding a new place. Love you all! Alice
xxxxx

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Corey Worthingness

At risk of being the only commentator, editorialist, bloger, whatever, who had not expressed an opinion please find the following contribution.
Just like you I’m outraged by the gall of Corey Worthington, the audacity to trash the parental home, attack the bastions of law, refuse to apologise, and far worse not even remove the sunglasses in spite the demands of Leila McKinnon; outrageous. How must our Kelly feel as she tries to defend her homeland pride in face of this bogan; er chav onslaught, media borne from down under. These were my thoughts as I sought inspiration for today’s lesson when I chanced on this excerpt from a piece I had been writing about my friend Harley in anticipation of his obituary. (oh please! Someone has to write these things and when the time comes the public is very impatient. It’s best to be prepared.) I am describing here the on goings, mostly mine as usual, at an accommodation he, I and others shared late sixties in Edgecliffe Road Woollahara.

Edge City earned its name from this type of petty urban guerilla action. My flat cost $25:00 a week, unimaginable now. Still it seemed to great a price to pay to greedy capitalist pigs. The gas company was our first target. When we failed to pay their bill they cut us off by placing a tin cap in the line into the meter to stop supply. Gimmy strength we simply removed the cap and re connected. Next they removed the section of supply pipe so we replaced it with hose. Now they came and dug up the street, removed a section of pipe and re filled the hole. We dug it back out but assed that it would be too arduous to fit a bodgee connection and that we could survive electrically without the threat of explosions in the neighborhood. We weren’t mad.

Electricity individually metered was the next target. When mine was disconnected owing to failure to pay bills I came up with an ingenious idea. Taking an extension lead and replacing the female socket with another male, I plugged an end into one of my dead power points, threw the cable out my window into Harleys and plugged the other end into one of his live ones. Viola! All my power points now were powered as long as Harley kept me switched on and he never failed me. Of course this extra load placed a strain on the fuses which we found we could fortify with ever increasing diameters of wire right up to the classic nails. When the day arrived, as it had too, when Harley’s power too was disconnected, your favorite innovator said no worries and proceeded with another cable downstairs to James Ricketson’s place (he always paid his bills) and finding him out I didn’t even have to ask permission to plug into his supply. Now years before the internal stair between mine and James floors had been removed necessitating a walk the long way around the building to reach James’s pad directly under mine. By the time I made it back, maybe a minute or more, everywhere I looked around my flat the large skirting boards carrying the power lines were smoking. Well I’m no fool, I recognized a dangerous situation and made haste back to James’s pad where at great personal risk I reefed the hot, sticky, melting cable from its socket.

Now re-reading this tale I reflect that to you I look a lot less clever than Corey Worthington and you’d be right. These actions pre-dating Andy Warhol’s fifteen minutes of fame prediction, were petty, stupid and dangerous but I draw your attention to the attitude that accompanied them which I suspect was spawned in the same primordial adolescent soup that Corey swims in. O yes I was probably twenty three but adolescence lasted much longer back then. I’m not about to predict how Corey’s fame may affect his future, I can however relate that my similar, though never famous attitude led only and inevitably to my latest eviction.

Eviction sounds right to me though to many it seems too harsh and they prefer TERMININATION OF RESIDENTIAL AGREEMENT as the Agents do. The effect is the same, I must vacate by March 23, a little sooner than the average seven years most folk stay put these days but I’m not complaining. I do however recommend to you young’ns that even if you do a Corey, don’t make it a lifestyle choice as it seems I have.

Alice has asked me to appoligise to all for her slack blog and “wedding thank you letters” record (um!!! I missed that one too) but hastens to point out that she edits a whole magazine for those interested in her activities and if that’s not enough she now publishes a blog from the magazine website at http://au.lifestyle.yahoo.com/womens-health/ . If you decide to venture there don’t leave without taking in the fascinating and possible useful information contained in an item called ”Boys' Bits”.
Robert

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

If I were you Rupert

I’m having one of those I wish I was Rupert Murdock weekends. I’ve been trying to post some Christmas photos but have received absolutely no assistance at all from Blogspot or their Google masters. “Buy Blogspot and burn it” I imagine my Rupert self commanding, “and bring me the ashes on antique silver within the hour” I fantasize. Then of course the fantasy gets derailed as I imagine such wealth and the lusciously indolent lifestyle I would indulge with it, right out of character with Rupert who by my estimation works much too hard. Power is delicious as I can easily imagine when fantasising sacking my boss after first forcing him to dive naked into a pigs wallow but I really think that I would come into my own, achieve my forte so to speak, spending wealth rather than exercising the power thereof. So perhaps Rupert is not who I would wish to be after all though I would certainly appreciate having a bit more control over my life than I find I do. On Sunday I saw an advertisement in this weekends Spectrum headed ‘Accommodation for students wanted’ and read on to appreciate that there was a market out there among rich Singaporean and Bengalese students for my spare room. Yesterday at lunch I mentioned this to Alice who saw it as a good revenue raiser for the proposed 09 family day in Tuscany and that night repeated it to Jack who much more in sync with the Ruperts of this world was on the phone that night with tips on presentations and an offer to display ads on his school notice board. After a night spent in dreams of foreign fortunes and their dispersal in equally foreign climes in an unusually cold light of dawn I stood in my newly conceived asset wondered about the king size bed (Stephen’s) and what other furnishings a student might need. Still pondering such things mid morning I took a call from Jane who had overnight conceived an ancestral connection between our family on the Byrne side and that of the reprobate actor Jack Thompson. Unable to contain news of my new good fortune I informed her of the great money making scheme and we disengaged with best wishes as telephone conservationists do. No sooner did I hang up than the phone again rang with greetings from Daryl from Richardson and Wrench (I wonder did Wrench start out as Richardson’s enforcer and thus become indispensable? Sounds so to me) my agents who wondered could he come by as Tony, the owner, was considering repairs or possibly selling. Funny isn’t it that the landlord, previously only Dr. A. Boyden on a lease is now as I face eviction on a first name basis. Now were I Rupert ( the more often I write it Rupert flows so much better than Robert, I may change my name) I would have no problem with this little inconvenience, indeed I would not even have this inconvenience and if I had one of my minions would have taken care of it long before it became my inconvenience. Do you think if I went to the Agent and explained that I was actually Rupert O’Keefe and that Robert was just a clerical error it might help? No.
Anyway another phone call has now broken my concentration and re-reading I note this is all silly. Suffice to say to those far away; I’ve got the pics and will blog them as soon as the clock around that exclamination mark street sign in Blogger continues past nine o’clock or due west to those unfamiliar with analogue clocks. Stay in touch and don’t forget to re-hydrate

Saturday, January 12, 2008

My first English football match

Hi everyone

Experienced my first Premiership football (soccer) match this week. It was mental - the fans take it so seriously over here - lots of passion and aggression both on and off the field!

We watched Chelsea (London team) v Everton (Liverpool team) and I learnt lots of rude songs about scousers (bogans from Liverpool). It was great to hear the banter between the fans and the singing in the stadium was louder than any rock concert!

Chelsea (the home side) scored the winning goal in extra time so it was a pretty close game and the fans went crazy! Here's some pics...





Love kel xxx

Friday, January 11, 2008

Hello from WA

Happy New Year.

Chris & I realised the other day that we have been in WA for 5 months and not planning on leaving until March, so I thought I’d share our experiences of this large state.

Starting with Kunnanurra where we saw crocodiles (freshies) sun baking on the caravan park lawn just in front of our van, to seeing the mighty Lake Argyle and the Ord River, flying over the Bungle Bungles which were absolutely amazing, then onto Derby where we flew over the Horizontal Waterfalls in a tiny 4 seater plane, down to Exmouth where we saw the gentle giants of the ocean leaping out of the water, where we also swam with turtles. Onto Coral Bay where we saw sharks 3 meters away from the waters edge, this is where we spent time snorkeling on the Ningaloo Reef.. Ningaloo reef is not as colorful as the Barrier reef, it has hard coral where the barrier reef has soft coral, it is more like a manicured garden under the water with mass plantings of coral, abundant fish life and they come right up to your mask and almost say hello.

To see the brilliant colors of the wildflowers, pink, blue, red, mauve, purple, yellows and whites and now seeing the fantastic WA Christmas tree with bright orange blooms, it is just beautiful. If you stay at a village that has a fishing port and your there when the fishing boats come in, you can buy direct from fisherman, lobsters and crabs for $10 and $5 and can I say you can get tired of eating them, ho hum.

We stayed at a place called Menzies a small town not much there except for The lake Ballard sculptures and the beautiful night skies that has millions of stars, it is on the way to the goldfields of Kalgoorlie, they have the super pit a massive open cut gold mine, they advertise the time of explosions so you can go and view this amazing sight, you see where they are going to blast and on countdown you feel the earth rumble for 10 seconds before the blast, something I’ve never seen before.

In Kalgoorlie, they also had an xmas parade when we there and it’s another first to see huge mine Tonka trucks in a parade, we met another couple there who have just turned up in this caravan park. To travel to the old majestic towns of Toodyay, Corrigan and York and to look at the interesting buildings, at Corrigan they have a Ute muster and a huge dog cemetery because all utes must have a dog, it brought tears to the eyes when reading some of the plaques.

Back to the coast for Christmas where we experienced 42 and 44 degrees on xmas and boxing days. We were told that Perth (and Jurien Bay) was the hottest place in the world on boxing day. We had a different xmas this year with being away from family and it doesn’t get any easier not having Kelly here, but isn’t she having the time of her life, she does promise to be back here for this xmas if only for a holiday and hopefully Mart will be joining her. We spent the morning at the beach which was different as on all other xmas days, I’m either busy in the kitchen or in the car going somewhere, so it was so nice just the 2 of us, we ate our xmas lunch, ham, turkey and salad at about 3pm and then had a sleep and dessert about 9pm, it was different but great.

From Jurien Bay we drove to the Pinnacles, a sandy gravel desert with mounds of rock you feel like your standing on a lunar landscape. In between Jurien Bay and Perth we stopped at a place called Dandaragan, it was like an apex park run by local people and an honesty box, the amenities were spotless and only 2 vehicles, us and a wicked van with an Irish couple who are here for 12 months so we had dessert together, it was 5 star accommodation for $15.

Now onto Perth where we’ve been for the last 2 weeks, just sightseeing and relaxing by the pool. We put Olly into a dog kennel yesterday and went to Rottnest Island for the day, saw quokkas, and did a bus tour of the island, the crystal water certainly attracts many people and boats, we all had a great day, Olly came back exhausted after his day of playing. I guess the highlight of our stay here is the other day I had to do the washing, we carry a small washing machine with us when we stay a while in one place we leave the machine outside under the awning when we are traveling it goes in the car. This day I saw something poke its head out from underneath, thinking oh my god a snake, I called out to Chris and he picked the machine up to see and sure enough a snake fell out of it, we saw it slither into the garden and haven’t seen it since so needless to say the washing machine stays in the car now unless I need to wash.

We are off to Busselton tomorrow where we are booked into a caravan park for 2 weeks. People tell us we haven’t seen the best of WA yet so I can’t wait to see the south coast because what I’ve seen so far has to be the most stunning coastline of Australia. Although you cannot compare it to the east coast, they are so different and Mission Beach is still my favorite. I pinch myself quite often, to experience this gypsy lifestyle is just the best. Although I’m a bit excited about SA, our beautiful daughter Kelly gave us a romantic hot air balloon ride for 2 over the Barossa Valley for xmas, so I’m really looking forward to that, we just have to do this by May, she does spoil us. Anyway that’s about all from me, take care, love to all.

Sue, Chris and Olly xxx

Thursday, January 10, 2008

My 1968

If memory serves me correctly, (and it often doesn't these days) when Kelly was in high school she was given a history assignment to research a particular year. I don't remember what the parameters were, but I immediately suggested she choose 1968 - a momentous year. The student riots in May in Paris, the Democratic Convention riots in Chicago, the assassinations of Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King, the uprising in Prague so cruelly put down by the Soviets, the Tet Offensive and God-knows-what else in Vietnam, and God-knows-what elsewhere. Recently there have been many press articles on this forty year anniversary.

Well, I thought I'd muse on my own personal 1968 - it was quite a momentous year for me, too. Amongst other things, it was the year I left Australian soil for the first time.

At the start of that year I was living a very comfortable double life. Having moved out of home at Strathfield at last, I was living in a smart terrace house in East Balmain, down by the wharf, with flatmate Bill Kirwin, a chemist and sometime tenor (He was for a little while, a Delltone - for those of you who can remember.)

By day I was a mild-mannered schoolteacher at St Pat's Strathfield - albeit driving a very sexy white Triumph Spitfire. I had started at St Pat's in 1964 with a fifth class of 56 pupils(!!) but in 1967 was "promoted" to the secondary school, where I was class teacher to a year 8 group and teaching English and history - and also non-examinable music to a year 10 group who scared the pants off me.

Years later, climbing the stairs to a gay club on Oxford St, a young man called Marcus stopped me and said, " You're Mr O'Keefe. You taught me at St Pat's. You wore a different suit every day, but we never thought you were gay!" Yes, teachers wore suits in those days - on some winter's days I kept my overcoat on, the classrooms were so cold.

Let's get rid of something else here. too. My first day at St Pat's I was issued with a strap and told to use it. I can't believe I used to hit kids. Eventually I stopped using it, not from any moral scruples (not many of those around then - certainly not with the "Christian" Brothers) but because on the follow-through I used to catch myself on the shin. Never were truer words, "This will hurt me more than it hurts you"! (NB: I don't want to be down on the Christian Bros, some of them were great friends and good teachers. But for the record I must point out that for years (five in my case), we lay staff were paying into a superannuation fund which was ultimately found to be non-existent - the brothers had never signed it. We got our money back, but no interest. Brother Trinks was thoroughly and rightly embarrassed.)

But by night, you are asking? Well, that was so much fun. I was out in Sydney's closeted gay world, having a ball - or several! (I really will try not to be tacky, but you have been warned.) We used to go to the Dugout Bar in the Rex Hotel in Castlereagh St (no longer there). The Mariner's Tavern next door was for the straights, and ne'er the twain did meet. That was the days of ten o'clock closing and one night the cheeky bar useful called out, "Time please, girls." and a room full of steely eyes and pursed lips were lasered on him until Merle the barmaid called out, "Don't worry loves, he's fuckin' camp his fuckin' self!" Tensions were eased.

Eventually our outrageous presence became too much for the no doubt Catholic hoteliers of the city. But they still wanted our custom, so they pushed us on to the the Rex at the Cross - much more salubrious for our type. Same chain, safer venue.

Now as I think Robert has written somewhere, with ten o'clock closing there was a Saturday ritual where you armed yourself with half-a-dozen DA bottles (that's long necks to you youngies), brcause someone was sure to announce at ten to ten, "There's a party at Ashfield/Leichhardt/Mosman, here's the address, bring your own." In those days, of course, one drove all over town pissed as a fart without a care. (Once, while still living in Strathfield, I went to a party in Mosman and then one in Coogee. I fully remember being at both parties, but have no memory of travelling in between. Surely, at some stage I must have crossed the Harbour Bridge?)

So what if there wasn't a party. Well, then you went to the Purple Onion. What a place! On Anzac Parade, now the Kensington Steam Baths, next to Grotta Capri, this was a drag club par excellence. Run by Candy Johnson and later Beartrice Williams (both drags, of course), it was an unlicensed nightclub (hence the BYO) with the most exotic floorshows. A $2 cover charge as I recall, and if you were wise you took a milk crate so that if the bitch on the door said, "Sorry, love, no more chairs," you proudly produced your own and were admitted. Rose Jackson and Karen Chant were headliners and there was a fine troupe of pre-Les Girls performers. In between acts you'd get on the dance floor and maybe get lucky.

Another great spot was the Petersham Dispensary Hall on Parramatta Road where once a month a committee run by Donnie Smith (later the Chameleons) put on a 50-50 dance. A real old time dance band, trestle tables topped with butcher's paper, barn dance, gipsy tap, Pride of Erin and lots of jitterbugging. When the barn dance became progressive, (butch on the outside, bitch on the inside) you'd progress until you reached a partner you fancied and then it was quite de rigeur to drop out of the circle and dance in the middle.

The third major venue was Chez Ivy's wine bar at Bondi Junction. In those days the alternative to pubs and restaurants was a wine bar, where only wine products could be served - including a ruinous concoction of brandy and wine called Brandivino - lethal! Run by Ivy Benson, a straight woman with more jewellery than I've ever seen on one perso, it wasn't quite glamorous, but it had its moments. One night a young lad came up to me and said, "You watch us playing football in the park from your balcony". Sprung! Yes, on Sundays I'd sit on the back balcony in Balmain and watch the young footballers. I hasten to add, your honour, they weren't schoolkids. but nineteens and twenty-somethings. I drove home and this one followed on his motorbike.

Look, this has gone on far too long and we haven't even got near a passport or an airport yet, so I'll close before you all doze off. But more soon, promise.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Happy 2008!

Hi everyone

Hopefully you all got my e-mail on how much fun we had in New York for New Year's Eve - it was mega. For those not on Facebook, here some holiday snaps...

Love Kel xx

Our welcome message at New York airport...


Radio City Music Hall... home to the Rockette's Christmas Spectacular!


The Statue of Liberty from Staten Island Ferry


Happy New Year!

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Correction

Apologies to all customers. Of course there is no “c” in “rokstump”. Don’t know what came over me. Perhaps I was still in thrall of Rockwiz when publishing at 2:30 this morning.
R

New Year List 07/08

Guess its up to me to do the new years list, serves me right for having started the tradition I suppose. For the sake of form I shall attempt an order of importance but hasten to add that this is just my own subjective opinion and that I welcome feed back and argument. Mum made her bid for immortality (yes death is an important stage in this quest) when she died on early March and it’s tempting to put this at number one but I think that even she would agree if she were still alive that Alice and Jack gazumped her.

The ever so grand wedding in November cleverly timed to take the limelight away from away from The Election starring many of the biggest names of screen and politics has to be the most important as this fool sees it. Add to that a holiday in Laos Cambodia and Vietnam, Moving out of home, and becoming an important editor of an important magazine in which she presents feature articles of herself complete with nude photos, must take the cake. Sorry mum but you’ll have to content yourself with second.

Third spot is a bit tricky but I’m going give it to Kelly for her carbon footprint. Chris and Sue are her obvious contenders as when they weren’t towing a mobile home around Australia were having international holidays in Europe. Kelly of course accompanied them on this Euro holiday and not from such vast distance, but to this she added the extravagance of a trip home for no more than the renewal of a visa, and now a trip to Cleveland USA including extravagant shopping trips to Target. Yes definitely Kelly at Three for alongside this footprint she also appears to have acquired a boyfriend to take that place in her heart previously the exclusive domain of Laurie Daly who’s even been calling her this year.

I’m giving fourth to The Nomads not only on account of the previously mentioned busy schedule but also because of their scrupulous documentation of the same in this blog. Bravo blogers! Any of you wishing to gain a high place in next years list should take note. They also got bonus points for clever Christmas card videos.

Five is difficult. Cat got a job in the movies but as yet I haven’t been invited to any hi-falutin parties nor have I seen Nicole at any family days. Gabby has surely graduated and will soon have a class of lucky kids though I’ve yet to see her in cap and gown nor even a picture. Hugh has become an excellent bloger and the first of the next generation of pensioners, two most admirable traits don’t you think. Dot bloged and soldiered on while Strobe bloged, went schizophrenic and had an insurance job done on his replacement hip. Ross and Anne are saving up on their travel footprint and pouring the saving into Rainwater tanks, kitchens and paint jobs, not to mention excellent family days and Christmas celebrations. John has survived a dangerous medical condition as indeed has Anne and as yet neither of them have had to resort to a medical malpractice suit. The Gardener, remember him, went even more feral and plunged much further into the Australia of pioneers, heroes and serial murderers. Lets hope he’s keeping a diary least his stories be wasted. I should mention Chris and Matt who last year turned from insignificant sports mad others into very interesting relatives. Welcome to the list Chris and Matt. Yes five is difficult, perhaps you would like to arrange the rest. I’m going to sleep on it.

Before I go though, Hugh, you and anyone else interested in the type of musings in your most recent delightful blog, especially you Alice who have been recently asking so many questions, should go to "rokstump.blogspot.com" where recently I placed some similar rubbish which I wrote some time ago. It is rather long and I felt that publishing it here might cause readerphobics to go away and never come back. Pack a picnic basket and spend some time at Aintree with me.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Christmas in Cleveland

Hi guys

It was lovely to talk to you all on Boxing Day. I had a great time in the USA - despite not having a white Christmas!

For those not on Facebook, here are some of my holiday snaps from C-twon. Will post some from New York next week.

Love ya xxx Kel

Melissa and I at her brother's cheezy Christmas swaeter party...


Me doing an impressive air guitar outside the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame on Clelvand's Lake. The building looks like the Louvre in Paris and is designed by the same architech. Was so much fun - especially the tribute to the Doors, the Beatles and the history of Rock n Roll 3D movie!


Keeping warm at Chagrin Falls... and my new brown locks!

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Another Blast from the Past

My good mate Garry Scale is an actor. As such, he travels a lot, staying in "digs" or with friends. On one occasion he stayed in Brisbane with fellow actor Rainie Skinner. Rainie tells the story, to illustrate what a wonderful house guest he is, that returning home after picking up Tim, her eight-year-old son, from school, she found Garry cleaning out the cupboard under the sink. Young Tim said, "What are you doing?" Garry replied, "I'm cleaning the cupboard under the sink. I'm a homosexual, that's what homosexuals do."

All by way of saying, yes, Chris, I decorated the tree - that's what the family faggot does. Not that I knew what I was at the time and probably no one else did, either. But thanks for your warm reminiscence of those Goolmangar days - though you left out the blowies, the mosquitoes, the humidity and the smell of stale milk and cowshit. Maybe you were too young. (Years later, one Christmas, living in London, I recieved the usual fortnightly airletter from Mum, where she said in passing, "Nobody's ever done the tree like you did." That got a great chuckle of recognition from my new gay friends.)

But to stick with my theme, I must go back to Ryde one last time. I went St Kevin's, Eastwood (now Marist College?) from years 4 to 6. By year six the classmates were beginning to talk about girls. I was nowhere near puberty, but what they described as liking in girls - looks, hair, etc - was what I liked in some of them. I mean, though I knew nothing of sex, I harboured the same longings towards my handsome classmates as they were expressing of the fairer sex. So I guess I was homosexual before I was sexual, if you see what I mean!

Also at that time, I spent some of the summer holidays at the Blewitts' farm at Cobbity, near Camden. Uncle Mac and Aunty Pauline managed a dairy farm for the Downs family. My cousins Peter , Paul and Michael lived there. One day they took me down behind the barn and told me an extraoardinary thing: babies came out of their mothers' tummies! I knew this to be patently absurd - after all, I read books (I'd just been bowled over by "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland") and they were merely country hicks. Besides, I knew babies came from hospitals - that's where Mum had got Robert and Chris. I humoured them, but I did not make a big thing of it, as I was a bit of a wimp.

In 1953 a lot happened. Grandma O'Keefe died and left the farm at Goolmangar to Dad. He decided this was a great chance to start a new life for his family on the land. So in September the family all piled into the new (but second-hand) Holden and headed north - all except me. Because I was in sixth class - doing the still significant Primary Final - it was decided that rather than disrupt my schooling, I would see out the year living with Nona and Grandfather, two doors down at Number 53.
That was great, I never had to make my bed and was spoiled rotten for three months. But I missed my family. In December school ended and I took the train - the Northern Express with the great 3801 steam engine that I'd often seen pass through West Ryde or Eastwood stations on my way to and from school - to Casino, its nearest stopping point to Lismore. After a long and sooty trip I got off the train to see Mum and Dad waiting for me. I dropped my suitcase, ran to Mum, flung my arms around her and burst into tears. What did she do? She extracted herself from me, looked down and said, "Oh, don't be so foolish!" Her exact words, I can still hear them, I can never forget them. I learned at that moment that one didn't express one's emotions, it just wasn't done. It took me years into adulthood to let loose of this principle. (Many years later, when I co-wrote the music, book and lyrics for the highly successful "A Lad 'n' His Lamp", a Christmas panto at the Marian St Theatre, Killara, (1978) I took Mum and Dad and other family members to a matinee. When it ended, Dad's first words to me were, "It must take a lot of people to put on a show like that.")

So here I was at a major watershed of my life - primary to secondary, city to country. Eleven years old and still a good way from puberty. I knew three swear words, and three only - bloody, bugger and bastard - and knew enough not to use them, ever. I was a bookworm, a total cissy on the sports field and extremely introspective. And I had to start making new friends and adjusting to a totally alien life. One with animals and all the horrors of the rural world.

Maybe some more soon. Happy New Year.

Hugh